Articles 

Family implications when a child arrives with some type of problem or disability

Published by Ortofon (Speech Therapy, Clinical Psychology and Psychopedagogy Center), Nov 2013

The birth of a child represents a radical change in the family's organization; this requires physical and emotional space. All of these changes cause changes in family interactions. But what happens when parents learn that their child has some type of difficulty?

This represents a significant challenge for the family, often generating very strong emotions. They must seek information, services, help, and support. The event is often shocking and will likely have repercussions throughout the entire life cycle. At first, parents may feel alone and isolated, disoriented, and unsure of where to start looking. The existence of physical, psychological, or emotional damage in the child usually causes parents' behavior toward this type of child to differ from what they would have if the child did not have any difficulties.

All parents have certain expectations for their children, so learning that a child has some type of problem or disability shatters those expectations and can be a disappointment for some family members. This can even lead to a distorted image of the child and their abilities, as opposed to the ideal image they had formed before birth.

How parents respond and react to this event depends on several factors: the way the parents were raised, their skill and experience in dealing with these types of problems, the degree of difficulty or disability, the child's place in the family, the quality and nature of the support systems the parents had when they learned of the situation, the way the news was communicated, and the stability of family relationships.

Generally, parents' first reaction is to resist acknowledging reality, distorting the facts to make them more acceptable. Although the situation varies from family to family, almost all adaptation processes go through the same stages: they develop the ability to face the truth, accept the child's specific problem, make positive efforts to help the child, and focus their attention on finding therapeutic solutions that will promote the child's healthy development.

However, the consequences of having a child with some type of difficulty or disability are not only emotional for the family, as it also often creates problems in daily routines, such as difficulties carrying out certain activities previously performed, affecting the family's social relationships, marital problems, etc. Not to mention the inevitable economic impact that these situations often entail.

But parents are not the only ones affected. Having a sibling with some type of difficulty or disability is not only an emotional shock, as siblings also suffer greatly from this. The latest research on this topic seems to indicate that older siblings of a person with a disability are more socially adaptable than younger siblings and present fewer problems; although it is true that as siblings grow older, the difficulties or problems may increase. The most common problems are jealousy due to less attention and dedication from parents, having to take on other roles not appropriate for a sibling, such as playing the role of caregiver, defending a sibling from bullying or aggression, etc.

Current results indicate that although the process is very long and painful, if families have the resources, they can adapt through effort and persistence. To make this process as bearable as possible, psychological support for all family members and early intervention are essential to address the problems experienced by children with disabilities and their families.

Author: Yaiza Antelo Carracedo,

Child Psychologist, Specialized in Early Intervention

and collaborator of Ortofón